Nobody Is Perfect
Nobody Is Perfect
Ok, that’s an old adage, and we know that it is certainly true. But just trying to get to perfection can lead to a lot of stress and health problems, according to psychologist Dr. Gordon Flett at Toronto’s York University.
Greens are generally driven to find the perfect answer, product, research, or solution. Oranges quickly find the fine line (and balance) between perfect, or right, expedient and good enough. Blues are also not that concerned with perfectionism. After all, they build strong relationships, because Blues will let others see them for who they really are, in genuine ways, and will cry with someone, just as easily as laugh with them.
That leaves our Gold friends, who can tend to values perfectionism in themselves. While this drive serves Golds well, it can also lead to challenges if it involves setting unrealistic standards. Flett has even developed a questionnaire for it, but it will end up being Golds who score high in this area.
Flett also believes the drive for perfectionism can be traced back to childhood. But if that is really the case, was it because of high expectations of a parent, or was it already in the Gold child’s DNA to want to draw that picture perfect, and get a little stressed when coloring outside the lines? With a Gold child, it is important to keep reassuring your son or daughter that they are loved for who they really are, and not as a result of doing something right.
This becomes just as valuable at work, with our staff, and in all of our relationships. For Golds to hear and to believe that letting their best be good enough can be really valuable. It also helps when Golds honestly ask themselves whether the need for perfection is necessary all the time. In fact, just learning to ask for help is often a huge positive, because others on our team will feel included and valuable, rather than shut out, and “not good enough.”
Nobody’s perfect. We all know that. But even making the journey towards that goal can come with some harmful side effects along the way. There is a time and a place for everything, but it sure can be hard to find an on-off switch for many of our Colors’ strengths and behaviors.
©George Boelcke, CCP www.vantageseminars.com
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