Posts Tagged ‘humor’

Myers-Briggs Prayer

November 1st, 2008

The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) very much correlates to Colors, but adds a couple of dimensions and includes introvert (the “I” of the first letter) and extrovert (the “E” of the first letter). This MBTI prayer has been around for years and you’ll certainly find your Colors in it:

ISTJ: Lord, help me begin relaxing about little details tomorrow at 11:41:32 A.M.

ISFJ: help me be more laid back, and help me do it exactly right!

INFJ: help me not be a perfectionist (did I spell that correctly?)

INTJ: keep me open to others’ ideas WRONG though they may be!

ISTP: help me consider people’s feelings even if most of them are hypersensitive!

ISFP: help me to stand up for my RIGHTS! (If you don’t mind my asking)

INFP: help me to finish everything I star…

INTP: help me be less independent, but let me do it my way.

ESTP: help me take responsibility for my own actions, even though they’re usually not my fault.

ESFP: help me take things more seriously; especially parties and dancing.

ENFP: help me keep my mind on one thi…LOOK, A BIRD!…ng at a time.

ENTP: help me follow established procedures today.  On second thought I’ll settle for a few minutes.

ESTJ: help me not to try running everything.  But if you need some help, just ask!

ESFJ: give me patience, and I mean RIGHT NOW!

ENFJ: help me do only what I can, and trust you for the rest.  Do you mind putting that in writing?

ENTJ: help me to slow downandnotrushthroughwhatIdoamen.

Walter’s Advice Column

May 1st, 2008

If you have a sense of humor, is this the reason most Greens (or perhaps men in general) shouldn’t write advice columns?

Dear Walter:

I hope you can help me. The other day I set off for work leaving my husband in the house watching the TV as usual. I hadn’t gone more than a few hundred yards down the road when my engine conked out and the car shuddered to a halt. I walked back home to get my husband’s help. When I got home I couldn’t believe my eyes. He was parading in front of the wardrobe mirror in one of my dresses and high-heel shoes. When I confronted him, he broke down, cried, and admitted that he’d been wearing my clothes for six months and he says he has been feeling increasingly depressed. I love him very much, but he has become increasingly distant. I don’t feel I can get through to him anymore. Can you please help?


Dear Sheila:

A car stalling after being driven a short distance can be caused by a variety of faults with the engine. Start by checking that there is no debris in the fuel line. If it is clear, check the jubilee clips holding the vacuum pipes onto the inlet manifold. If none of these approaches solves the problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the carburetor float chamber.

I hope this helps.


Can We Be Orange Without the Score To Prove It?

March 1st, 2008

“Hi George: I am high Green/Gold AND people have often pointed out that I seem to be very Orange. How could that be? After everything is taken care of properly, I can relax and be silly – but how can I be “high” Orange but not like the verbal, disorganized and late parts?

I can laugh, but for a lot of years, during difficult times, I don’t remember laughing.  As a matter of fact, that is one reason that I married my husband – I noticed that I was laughing around him. So, what do you think? I do love me and think that I am pretty well rounded.”

Hello Green/Gold buddy: If you’re looking for definitive answers – you’re out of luck, because Colors isn’t a math thing, or an exact science. It sounds like you’re confused, when you should be happy, instead. Are you wondering if you HAVE to be a certain way because your score has defined you? Are you kidding? You’re all four Colors, whether that’s by score or behavior. After all, there’s a time and a place for everything, isn’t there?

You’re not “losing” your Green or Gold, and maybe the Orange isn’t and won’t be reflected in your score, but there’s a lot of ways to be Orange. Just like there are many ways to be Blue without having that as your highest score (that was a recent newsletter story: You don’t have to be Blue to be nice). If you can embrace and grow your “orangeness” you’re well on the way!

Right now, your fun is “earned” after the work is done, as is the case for Golds. You’ve learned to laugh again, not to take things so seriously, or to worry about everything. Pick your spots, ease up on the hundreds of rules you have, know when perfect is important, and when “good enough” really is good enough. Remember that there are four different definitions of organized and that “whatever” sometimes is a great answer the times you get so worked up about silly stuff in the big picture of life.

You’ve had a huge Orange deficiency for years – it’s great that you’re “back” and make sure your husband gets the recognition and rewards for helping you with that!

Oranges are always looking for a few good people to join them! The tools of Colors are like a buffet. You don’t have to take everything – you pick what you want! That’s how we grow, become coachable and learn. But your e-mail lists the three likely Orange traits out of context and not always accurate. It’d be nice if your Green could re-think the labeling of Oranges, and your Gold could take them off the Orange judgment list.

The Green Quiz

December 1st, 2007

OK, you can only read this if you have a sense of humor! High Greens REALLY want you to know this! It’s important, so see how many of these you agree with:

  • Your boss is a little scared of you.
  • You don’t suffer fools at all – let alone gladly.
  • You know the difference between “infer” and “imply”, “borrow” and “lend”, “median” and “meridian”.
  • You chastise your co-workers when they say “how ironic” over something that isn’t truly ironic at all and your head explodes when they use the word “irregardless”.
  • You stand behind your partner while he/she’s typing a letter and correct his/her spelling, punctuation and spacing.
  • Your boss submits proposals and reports to YOU before sending them out to potential customers or management.
  • You know the proper contexts for there/their/they’re, hear/here, you’re/your, peace/piece, and other simple homophones (not homonyms, like drive and drive, or homographs, like bow and bow) like these.
  • You know the difference between a homonym, homograph, and homophone.
  • You know the difference between the British and American way of spelling various words, e.g. colour/color, cheque/check, and make sure you consistently use one set of rules, unlike most people who are clueless as to which is which.
  • You know how to spell “faux pas” and use it correctly in a sentence.
  • You know when to use “you and I” (“we”) and “you and me” (“us”), unlike the illiterates around you who believed the teacher that told them you must always use “you and I”.
  • During most newscasts you catch at least two or three grammatical or sentence structure errors and fight the urge to send the broadcaster an e-mail and really blast them.

How many statements do you agree with?

Score of 9-12:Congratulations, you’re high Green – see item 1! But right now you’re asking yourself why everybody wouldn’t score 9-12 here…

Score of 6-8: High Greens would concede you’ve got potential. Maybe one or two more night classes…

Score of 5 or less: You might be a little “green deficient”. Or more than likely, you started skimming the list with your brain screaming “who cares”?